An Ambivert’s Admiration for Confidence

Hi friends, hope we’re all keeping well.

This week I kind of want to talk about something that’s been on my mind for as long as I can remember. It’s something I truly wish I could’ve been born with and used in many different situations; confidence.

To people who consider themselves confident: How on earth do you do it? I fully understand it’s probably as natural to you as breathing air is, but for many people (including myself), it’s still just as spectacular to watch and be around. Everyone wishes they could be around someone who’s confident in themselves and know what they’re doing. It’s always a pleasure and joy to watch confident people talk about their day, and listen to their stance and opinions on things.

I know so many admirable people in my school with this trait, and everyone I’ve talked to also agrees on how likeable and sociable these people are. It’s almost as if no matter where they go, they’re always bringing a vibrant and dynamic atmosphere with them, so that people will always be at ease.

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🌲Can confidence be grown?🌲

This was the subject my friend, Viv, and I were debating very recently. While we both agreed that yes, like any other skill confidence can indeed be cultivated and improved upon, we wholeheartedly disagreed on exactly how difficult this would be.

He argued that it’s really easy, and that you simply need to put yourself in more and more uncomfortable social situations . Essentially, he advocated for learning through failure. Deal with it, get over the awkwardness, and socialise. He spent the majority of his time in 4th year of high school learning this skill, and has become a pretty confident person from my standards.

On the other hand, I proposed this would be a much more difficult task than what he was saying, especially for people who can be quite shy and introverted. In my opinion, to adopt confidence in yourself requires almost an entire paradigm shift of one’s personality and traits. Are you not fundamentally trying to change the way you’ve been acting since you were born? Does that not require a huge psychological tolerance? In comparison to other skills like juggling, chess, and swimming, you’re not really undergoing any major changes to yourself. Sure, you’ll be racking your brain a lot and testing your physical limits, but you aren’t really going through a major identity change, right?

Now, I’m not saying that you should or shouldn’t be changing your own identity. There’s all sorts of rare, unusual, and complicated situations that probably require you to change some parts about yourself for your own and the common good.

I just think that it would be a huge, major challenge to do so, especially when considering the traits of introverts.

That being said, I always try to keep an open mind on things, so if anyone wants to refute me on anything or discuss any parts of what I was saying, you’re always free to leave a comment.

Of course, I also absolutely, 100% do want to become more confident in myself too. It’s an absolutely invaluable skill to have, no matter what area of life you want to go into.

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🤠Advantages of Confidence🤠

Let’s take a closer look at how being confident can benefit you. Keep in mind this is my view on what confidence can do for you, despite me having very little of it.

-👥You attract all sorts of different people around you. Like I said, a heathy confidence exerts a warm aura that simply pulls other people toward you. Every time someone with great belief in themselves speak, it’s always a pleasure to listen to them. It becomes easier to network, make connections, and you’re increasing your surface area for more interesting and exciting things to happen to you.

-🤩You find great joy in doing whatever it is you’re doing. You never really question yourself, and thus pull through with amazing results in different things, like presenting a project or giving a presentation. My quiet self could never…

-😌I feel everything must be much, much easier when you’re confident. Many of the things that hold me back from doing things have mostly got to do with my own mind, like fear, doubt, and anxiety of what others will think or say. I see these flaws completely non-existent in the confident people I’ve met. If they want to say something, they’ll say it. If they want to add on to something, they’ll add on something. I accept they may simply be hiding these fears, but it is nevertheless still really impressive to me.

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Haha, this was definitely a bit of an unusual post for me. I just wanted to get off my chest how much I really do admire confidence. I think it takes a tremendous amount of courage to freely express who you are as a person, and say what you want (to an extent). It’s something that I really am working on, and hope I can in-still into me for the rest of my life.

Anyway, feel free to leave a comment on your thoughts on confidence. Am I over exaggerating some of the good qualities about confidence? Have I missed anything l? I’ll of course read every single comment that comes in.

Cool, stay safe guys, and I’ll hopefully see yous in another post 👋🏼